The Cruise of a Lifetime

“Look look look Uzair!!! Everything is soooo breathtaking”, Deepa squealed into Uzair’s ears. “I can see Deepa”, Uzair said stiffly, wishing she would talk softly or tone down her excitement a notch. But, he cocked his head ruefully as he looked at her innocence and joy. All he could see was the blue-green waters silently lapping in tiny swells around their ship. Uzair and Deepa had been seeing each other for 2 years but they knew each other from when they were children.

Both of them had met in the orphanage where they were dumped by fate. Deepa had been adopted by a very loving and warm family when she was 5 years old but she had a special attachment to Uzair and the ‘Light of our Hearts’ orphanage. Deepa kept in touch with Uzair all through their growing years and even made it a point to celebrate her birthday as well as Uzair’s birthday at Light. They never lost touch with each other but two years ago their friendship had blossomed into a steadfast courtship. No two people on earth could have been as different from each other in personality than these two. Deepa was always full of life, her eyes sparkling with mischief and spunk. She was effervescent and playful. She enjoyed little things and seemed to want to create joy out of nothings. Uzair on the other hand was a grim fellow. He had worked back-breaking hard to make something of his life. He excelled in his studies, learning from tattered second-hand books and from going to a shabby government school. He was scrappy and was great at saving up. He put himself through college with some help from fundraiser platforms and Deepa’s parents as well. He had gotten through one of the best B-schools in India and secured a job with a fat paycheck too. Life had given him more to smile than frown about. But this didn’t make Uzair’s personality any more amicable. He was a stiff young man who couldn’t laugh if a joke sat on the tip of his nose. He was always on edge, quiet, and ultra-practical too.

Anyway, the two of them had saved up to go on a cruise together. The moment Deepa walked out onto the deck, she started skipping with excitement. Uzair, although conscious of what a racket she was making, looked at her joy, and felt content. The two of them were going to relax and enjoy the bliss of being in the middle of nowhere. Even he couldn’t be grim at that fabulous thought. A smile finally cracked on his stiff face.

The first couple of days were very uneventful. They swam on the pool at the top deck, ate at the fancy restaurant, and enjoyed something like a mini Cirque Du Soleil performance on day one. Day two was a repeat with swimming, playing some games, and exquisite food. On the second evening, they attended a small ball organized by one of the rich socialites who was on board. It was his mistress’s birthday and they had a grand gala where everyone was invited. After a tiring evening of forcefully being dragged to the dance floor by Deepa, all Uzair wanted was to sneak off quietly to his room. At 8 pm he finally excused himself feigning an upset stomach and he walked away while Deepa refused to leave the dance floor.

At 10 pm Deepa rushed into their room, panting! She sounded too excited and her words tumbled out of her mouth in a mad rush. Uzair looked at her quizzically and asked her to calm down. “Ms. Poppy is throwing a hissy fit up there, Uzair”. Ms. Poppy’s jewel studded clutch had gone missing and the upper deck of the cruise ship was filled with commotion. A search party of the crew was combing the ship meticulously while Ms. Poppy was throwing her weight around and threatening to put everyone out of work and behind bars.

It was nearing midnight when Uzair finally managed to tear Deepa away from the lingering gossip mongers and into their room.

The next morning Uzair woke up even grumpier than it seemed was possible. A lack of sleep and excessive dancing had made him miserable. To add to his misery, Deepa wanted to go and investigate if Ms. Poppy’s clutch had been found. It took a great deal of restraint for Uzair not to shout at Deepa. “Can you stop meddling in business that isn’t ours”, he snarled at her. Deepa didn’t want to upset Uzair and so she agreed to forget about the matter. They went to the spa for a couple’s massage. When Deepa opened her eyes 40 minutes later, Uzair was missing. She enquired with the masseuse who said that he felt uncomfortable with it and left within 10 minutes, not wanting to disturb her. Deepa walked all over the expansive ship for a while, looking for Uzair and finally gave up and sat down in one of the restaurants. Her feet were aching and she was hungry. Where the hell was Uzair, she thought, as she headed towards the buffet. She loaded her plate and was walking towards the table when she spotted her grim-faced boyfriend walking to her.

“Why are you always so serious, Uzzi”, she asked jokingly. He shook her hand off his shoulder and hissed under his breath-“Pavan Dewan’s briefcase was found on one of the lower decks, all content emptied from it. I don’t think Ms Poppy lost her clutch, Deepa”.

“What do you mean, Uzzi. Is someone stealing stuff? Wow, our cruise just got really interesting, na?” she laughed lightly. Uzair looked serious. “We have to be careful Dee”, he said.

“Why? Are we stealing stuff?”, she joked.

“That’s not it. Our stuff could get stolen too, right? And there will definitely be intrusive searches now. It will be a nuisance”, he added

“As if we have bags of diamonds with us Uzzi. Who will want to rob us? Anyway, this ship is not so large as to have a ‘brig’ and the security personnel insn’t police. Nobody is searching anybody, ok. Relax and let us enjoy our holiday”.

They tried to enjoy themselves and they went to the casino and played all day. Winning some money seemed like it cheered Uzair up. But it was as if somebody was out to make sure that everyone on board was miserable. The next morning at around 11, the gossip vine brought news that Mrs. Parmeshwari Chawala’s emerald necklace was missing. Security cameras had turned up nothing and it was baffling as hell.

“Where were you Uzair?”, demanded Deepa. She sounded angry. “Every time there is some scandalous news, you are nowhere to be seen. Ms. P’s emerald necklace is missing”, she shouted.

“Relax Dee. I felt really sea sick so I went looking for the medical officer. Why are you looking at me as if I am the thief”?

“No baby, I just meant you are never around when I want to share some piping hot news. It’s ok. Forget about Parmeshwari and her necklace. This cruise hasn’t done anything for you and I am glad we are getting off tomorrow. Now can we please spend a little time together for the rest of the day?” she bantered.

Uzair shrugged and followed her as she walked towards the basketball court. “Let’s shoot some hoops. I know you will at least enjoy that”, she said.

They played for a bit and headed out to the bar. Just as they were entering, the service staff who was walking past them tripped and a green drink spilled all over Uzair’s pale salmon coloured tee.

The waiter apologised and offered to have the shirt sent to laundry but Uzair excused himself and told Dee to get her drink. He told her he would change and be back in a jiffy.

When he came back there was a crowd gathered near the bar and Deepa was sitting at a table close by and watching intently. Uzair approached her and enquired, to which she raised her eyebrow and pointed to a man in a blue t-shirt. “His wallet is missing and he blamed the guy sitting next to him and they got into a fight. Apparently, his wedding ring was in the wallet and his wife is going to be furious when he gets to the shore. She shrugged and continued drinking. Uzair felt like this cruise was not all that great as it was made out to be, but at least he got some time away with Dee. He sat down and held her hand and proceeded to tell her that this had been a quirky but fun holiday and he was glad to have her by his side.

The next day they disembarked from the ship as it came to port. They took a taxi and reached his house first. Uzair would drop Dee off after they were rested. He lifted the luggage out of the taxi and dragged it in. The stuff was heavy and he could barely grip it. Just as he reached his room, he lost his grip on the suitcase and it came crashing to the floor. The strewn contents had among them a studded clutch, an emerald necklace, and a stranger’s wedding ring. Uzair spun around, shocked, to see Deepa standing at the doorway. She threw her hands in the air and smiled- “Ok, now you know I’m a kleptomaniac”.